Let me just start this blog post by saying; “Can we not emulate the Church when it comes to abusing parishioners?” Seriously, we like to sit around and complain about the fact that they stole all of our spiritual practices and built their churches on our sacred sites, but I’d rather we not adopt practices like sexual abuse and spiritual manipulation from them if you don’t mind. I realize we are trying to reassert ourselves and wrench our ancient practices from their fists, but riddle me this; How are we better than them when we allow pedophiles, sexual abusers and spiritual manipulation in our midst? How are we better, when we cover for these perpetrators to save face for our organizations, or to protect our spiritual street cred? Or worse yet because the whole organization is rife with nepotism and covering for the inner circle? If you see yourselves in this statement, it’s because I am pointing directly at you and you disgust me.
Lately so many cases of sexual predation within spiritual groups have come to light, from simple witchcraft groups, to churches, to festival circuits, to back rooms of metaphysical stores and it’s infuriating, disheartening and downright maddening. So let’s talk about the red flags you should be watching for.
1) A random person contacts you via message on social media, email or by phone telling you that they were drawn to you, or they suggest that spirit guided them to you, or the divine sent them to assist you. (You should block them immediately)
2) They introduce themselves as a Master (in 58 years I’ve never met one that was real), or they assert they are a Guru, a Master of this or that discipline/art, or as a Keeper of knowledge or Guardian. (Point, laugh and walk away) My experience has been that if you have to toot your own horn, you ain’t got much to offer! Frankly there is so much one would need to learn about each and every esoteric discipline, that it would literally take a lifetime if not several, to learn all there is to know. One would have to be completely dedicated to the study of the discipline, living, sleeping, eating and breathing the history and practices 24/7 to be an actual master. There are a lot of these so-called enlightened beings roaming the streets today, eye each with extreme suspicion, and listen for the costs of having conversations with them. The most intelligent, enlightened conversations I’ve ever had, usually happened with people around campfires or on two wheels, they wore no robes or sandals, they didn’t have any Mr.T crystal starter kits around their necks, they didn’t prance around pretending to be a goddess or god incarnate and certainly didn’t spout toxic positivity Ad nauseam.
3) If they provide a service to you for a fee such as a divination of some sort and then offer to remove the attachments or cut cords for you that they found in the process of doing a reading for you. (ask for your money back, call them a charlatan and walk away)
4) If they approach you on the street or at a gathering talking about your ‘aura’ in any way, you should be on the defensive immediately because that’s often the hook but not always; very rarely will it be a genuine person paying you a compliment, when you hear the price for the conversation, you’ll have your ‘answer’. Walk away!
5) If they’re reading cards or throwing bones, runes, or performing any other kind of divination for you and begin to say things like, I see in the cards that you need my assistance with… or suggest that the cards are saying you need them in your life, put them on the spot and ask them to show you ‘where’ they see that in the cards and how! This is a big, red flag, get up and walk away! If during the reading the reader invites you to join any group, club, church, circle, or closed practice, be extremely wary, this is how cults draw you in, by making you feel you need them or would be better off in their company for their insight or protection. They will seem very mystical and powerful… It's an act. Lions don’t have to show how powerful they are, because the lion knows its power. Find circles, clubs and groups the old fashioned way, show up, watch them for a while, get to know the people, then if you want to join, join.
6) If you can’t question your teacher, you don’t have a teacher, you have a cult leader. Run. You should be able to question anyone about anything at any time so long as you’re not trying to disrupt an event. Those questions should be answered and sources cited, if there’s a difference in viewpoint, then the two parties should simply agree to disagree. No one should “Force” or attempt to “Manipulate” your feelings on an issue, Cult leaders do this through intimidation, shaming, shunning, embarrassing you in front of their followers, etc… The list goes on and on. Someone who has faith in their findings will readily share their findings with you when you make a query, if they immediately bristle, appear to be incensed, insulted or act as if you attacked them, they’re projecting and protecting their territory as cult leaders.
7) Healers, Gurus, Masters, Teachers who initiate sexual relations with students are using sex to control you and manipulate your emotions. They are unhealed and should not be providing services to anyone in their current state of mind. That energy is leaching and toxic and will turn into a vampiric relationship in most cases. An initiate should be looked upon as a child full of wonder and to taint that by abusing it, is the lowest form of sludge being, criminal manipulation I have ever witnessed. It is so disturbing and infuriating. A real practitioner looks upon an initiate as one to be protected, educated, treated with love and respect and taught to respect themselves and hone their insight and will. It is the highest compliment to a teacher when that ‘student’’ exceeds your teaching ability and moves onto higher practice. Those trying to hold you in their care when you’re trying to spread your wings and learn new things, are acting from their own insecurity and desire to control everyone around them. True mentors will love seeing you grow and watching you fly is their gift from spirit.
We’re all guilty when we refuse to see, refuse to speak out, or when we’re afraid to speak out for what it might do to our businesses, our families, or our friends group. Silence is complicity. Read that again. When you observe; report it and then continue to report again and again until you get action. In some cases it takes some diligence, or as in a recent case; no matter how many times it was reported, the offenders go on to do something heinous to an innocent and go to prison. It should have never been allowed to go this far, had the organization listened and acted, it might not have happened.
There’s also the other side of the coin to consider; when a member of the group is a person who was very alone in life and finds a group that makes them feel seen, heard, included, it’s hard to break away and when this group they’re in has positioned themselves so effectively in this person’s psyche using cult manipulation tactics, the person feels as if they’ll lose their entire world if they speak out about someone in the group committing heinous acts against members. They fear retribution or isolation from the entire group, so they acquiesce and stay in a dangerous situation. This is more common than you may think and we need to root this predatory behavior out in our community.
We need to empower our community so that they understand they are the gods of their own destiny, they are the arbiters of their own fates. Only then will we become a healthy, thriving community and hopefully a powerful movement. Until we nurture a culture that breeds this internal will and strength into being for every one of us, we will be subject to and victims of predation. Give your community all the tools, withholding information is a form of abuse. Read that again.
Em hotep!
Tay